My "Blog-Neglect"

I have neglected this blog... I am so sorry! I know my dear followers must be crushed. All 3 of you.

The Bumgarners are doing well. We had a nice Christmas, Terrence got a new tattoo, I got in a number of good runs, the dogs got loved, and the kids were given everything under the sun.



The twins are now 7 months old. Easton is basically sitting up, rolling over, and saying "Hey." He is doing some amazing things, all while eating well, sleeping well, and being a doll-baby/flirt/cutest little boy ever. Elle has a six word vocabulary /dada, mama, hey, bye-bye, pop, and dog/, is pulling to stand, and is nearly sleeping through the night  - she is only waking up at 4:30 to nurse for a minute - 30 minutes and sacking back out. She's an angel!

Ava is Ava. Forwards and Backwards. A palindromic name for a wild child who is uniquely and fittingly herself --- Ava. She had an "as seen on TV Christmas," and enough unicorns and kitties thrown in the mix to make my house look like fantasy land or even FAO Schwartz.  She got a bike and is so excited to ride it. Let's see when that will be? Um... I just can't believe she is big enough to be on one. Makes me want to cry.

Well I feel like an old fat mess... and have to get back into the swing of things. Running is one thing, but I need some other exercise, a better diet, and more control. This starts tomorrow, I swear.  Christmas did me in... I'm not sure if it was the two slices of Pecan pie, the bottles of red wine (all day everyday), salty snacks, chocolate covered cherries, or dismissing protein shakes for Bojangles... but I got fat. Not really, I look the same. But I feel gross and lardo-ish. I need to detox. CABBAGE SOUP? Nah, I'll just go back to old practices and I am ready to add some plyometrics to my exercise routines. I refuse to quit running.  I'd rather be a fat runner than a super-fit aerobics enthusiast any day.  Actually no that's not true... but you get my point... running isn't doing me any favors other than being my therapist, which is really a HUGE favor... I DIGRESS! I will eat better, sleep more, and do more than just run as my exercise.

Terrence is doing nicely... currently he is looking at me from time to time as he plays a video game.  He got a tattoo of two koi fish, one swimming north (pink) the other south (orange), around a purple lotus.  Ava's birth flower is the lotus. I am the orange koi, evidently I am going downhill... Elle is the pink koi, growing and only going up from here. What a good man.  Terrence has a whole tattoo dedicated to Easton on his other arm.  I get it, I hope Easton will get "MOM" inscribed in a heart tattooed on his arm when he is 18... I will sign for that at 15 if he is interested...  Ha! Nice thought... maybe?!?
Terrence is on vacation, a good while, and getting some rest.  I guess he deserves it. No, I know he does. Daddies work their butts off and Terrence is a particularly great Daddy.

Yoshi is continuing to pull out his hair and Momo stinks. Sounds pretty typical of the dogs.  Momo has run a few times with me and I have a great photo of him, soaked to the bone, on my phone, from our last run together.  He ran nearly 4 miles that day, faster than imagined, likely due to the 40 degree rain.  Yoshi is so old. He is sweet, likes to grin wildly, all the time, and makes the bed so warm at night.

Again, life is good and blog-neglect is okay... Neglecting the blog means we are living life to the fullest, with little complaint, and to our liking!  2013 here we come.  It is likely to be one of the most fulfilling, craziest, and loving years yet. I can't wait!

I am a runner and not a racer

I came to the realization today, that I am a runner and not a racer.  I have not enjoyed too many races in the past few years but it hit me today. I started a 10K and didn't finish it, not because I was tired or couldn't. That would never happen; I quit because I was officially done.  My 3 beautiful children were in the cold waiting for me to finish. At mile 4, I stopped, hugged them, and said "I'm done."

People run for many reasons. Here are many of the reasons I have complied below:
-Running to win: the 15 minute 5Ker in your community (tried to be a winner/cross country)
-Running to race: the diehard who goes every weekend to a race (did this)
-Running to try something new: people who do a 5K to say they did it, "couch to 5K"
-Running for pure exercise: running to keep in shape-on the treadmill or on the track (did this)
-Running to eat/drink: Really true! Many races provide massive amounts of alcohol at the end
-Running for health: People who started because they almost died
-Running because you can't play other sports: Cross Country? (did this)
-Running because you have to: Triathletes, who are generally cyclists, fall into this category
-Running for swag: People run races just to get free stuff ($500 gift cards, peanut butter, shirts, mugs)
-Running for someone else: The spouse of a runner; mother of a child runner
-Running for the community: Getting involved in an event and running for the community
-Running for God: Newest thing I have seen, people do weekly devotions and learn to run
-Running for the love of running: ME!

Running races removes the love of running for me. I can't handle that. I have a hard time explaining why. I see too many folks who are not serious and others who complain about running (not complain about the race); races take a lot of time, they do not motivate me, they cost money, and races hurt...

Tomorrow I would love to get in a 5 miler, with my dog. That would make me happy!

November Means Thanks

People have been posting on the net, daily, what they are thankful for. I'd like to say I am thankful for each minute of my day... but I have to complain sometimes! :)

In any case, here is my list of the "30 things" I am thankful for. 
(I got this idea from my friend Summer).

I am thankful for:
1) my beautiful house and home
2) a loving, wonderful, and handsome husband
3) my biggest blessings: Ava, Easton, and Elle
4) being crazy enough to care for two spoiled little dogs
5) being able to run, and run, and run some more
6) a warm king-sized bed, even though I sleep in it less than I would like
7) a rewarding career
8) a mother who inspires me to be a better person
9) a father who inspires me to do my best and aim high
10) a mother-in-law who loves my children and treats them better than could ever be imagined
11) a father-in-law who treats me like his daughter and dotes on his grandkids
12) unsweetened tea, seriously, I love it
13) a close family of  3 cousins, 2 grandparents, 2 aunts, and 2 uncles
14) coffee
15) blue jean days at work
16) health
17) the fact I was trained to do research (helps with my anxiety... haha)
18) Easton's service coordinator, Connie
19) occupational therapists, physical therapists, nutritionists, and the like
20) makeup, particularly eye liner and red lipstick
21) bubble baths
22) dry red wine
23) having faith
24) President Obama
25) my friends, who range from young to old, have all types of political affiliations, and religions
26) being able to write a report (speech)
27) Brooks....where would my life be without you?
28) insurance
29) internet, a phone, and a TV
30) being able to make my children's baby foods and being able to breast feed

I am thankful for so many more things. November needs 10,000 days!

OT=D/C

Sensory integration is defined as the neurological process that organizes sensation from one's own body and the environment, thus making it possible to use the body effectively within the environment.





We all have sensory differences.  For example, the thought of touching a sponge makes me want to pass out - the texture is abominable.   I even refuse to eat "sponge" cake.  Some people hate being touched, avoid bright lights or loud sounds, feel pain differently, thrive from movement, only eat certain textures... while others do the exact opposite. In my opinion, sensory differences are what make the world more colorful, interesting, and fun. 

Easton was diagnosed with a sensory integration disorder of regulation at 3 months of age. He didn't look at faces, he didn't startle to sound, he was terrified of everything, he was never happy, he seemed to be in pain.  (I think people call that a "colicky baby.")   I was floored. Occupational therapy was recommended for Easton. We also found out he could not see well and it all made sense. A month later, his vision matured and the sensory differences disappeared.  We continued with OT and doing our homework everyday.  He started pulling things together.  He still required a good deal of Mommy time (the person who understands him most) to help him cope, calm, and regulate. But those days are getting easier.  He is still swaddled to sleep, nurses to calm, and sits a good deal of time in his chair away from others when frustrated.  He is a happy baby and was discharged from OT today.  (Thank you Angie!)

Now, he is laid back and cool... so much that the little booger is slightly behind in his gross motor skills.  But, we get to move forward.  Physical therapy here we come.  I never thought I would be so proud of my six month old's accomplishments.  He is amazing!

(By the way, Elle sits unsupported for hours and Ava can do a 24-piece puzzle independently. Can't forget to mention my girlies! Mommy loves you two, too!)

Das ist gut!

Disclaimer: Ich habe die Deutsche, erste geschreiben, dann übersetzt sie unten/I wrote the German first then translated it below.
"Das ist gut"... Vielleicht die erste Satze ich habe auf Deutsch gerlernt.



Ich habe nicht, in eine lange zeit, Deutsch gesprochen oder geschreiben... also, vielleicht mit meinem Vater, eine kollegin, oder mit meine kinder, aber mit keine andere.  Ich denke auf Deutsch fast jeden tag and traeume auf Deutsch ein bisschen. Ich lese Deutsch manchmal: mit die Kinder, im der Zeitung, oder Facebook posts von Deutschland. So, was ist mein Problem mit Blogging auf  Deutsch?

Zuerst, habe ich nur eine paar freunden dass wird diese Blogs gelesen und diese kann nicht Deutsch. Dann, habe ich SO VIELE ZEIT (haha) fuer Blogging mit 3 kinder, 2 hunden, und ein Mann. Letzte, habe ich angst fuer die fehler mit Grammatik und Rechtscreibung.

Eine kollegin beim arbeit fragt mich heute, "Ava spricht Deutsch , oder? Und, wird die zwillinge Deutsch lernen?" Ich habe gesagt, "Na ja, sie (Ava) ist nicht so interessiert  und es ist schwer fuer mich, weil wir haben niemand mit zum ueben, weisst du?" Die sagt "Nein, du musst deine Kinder Deutsch zum lernen, die sind wie Schwaemme und schnell wird  alles abholen.

So wir lernen Deutsch zusammen... Ich bin die Lehrerin, die Kinder sind meine Schueler.

Die Bumgarners vielleicht sind nicht Genies aber wir sind genial und "das ist gut!"

Then the English~

 "That's good"... Is maybe the first sentence I learned in German.
I haven't spoken or written German in a long time... well maybe with my Dad, a gal at work, or with my children, but with no others. I think in German almost everyday and dream in German a little bit.  I sometimes read German with the children, in the newspaper, or in FB posts from Germany.  So what is my deal with Blogging in German.

First, I have only a couple of friends that will read this blog and they can't understand German.  Then, I HAVE SO MUCH TIME (haha) to blog with 3 children, 2 dogs, and a husband.  Lastly, I am scared of my mistakes with grammar and spelling.

A gal at work asked me today "Does Ava speak German? and Will the twins learn it?" I said "Uh, well, she (Ava) isn't interested and it is hard on me because I have no one to practice with, ya know?" She said "No! You have to teach your children German; they are like sponges and will quickly pick it all up."





Thus we are learning German together. I am the teacher and the kids are my pupils.

The Bumgarners maybe are not geniuses but we are awesome and "that's good!

How Are Things Going?

How are things going?
I get asked this nearly daily... if not more. "Things are moving right along," I usually respond.  Often I get looks like "How?" and "Are you lying?" or smirks.  But really, life is just "moving right along."
During the first month, I wrote a ridiculous schedule of my chaotic life.  It has improved incredibly, from chaos and frustration to chaos and joy. We are having a blast.

A typical day:

Wake up at 6:00 a.m. and take a shower.  (Pray that Terrence is turning on the coffee)

Get Easton at 6:15 and breast feed him, while drinking coffee, petting Momo, and putting on makeup.

After feeding Easton, I put him in the Bumbo, his bouncy chair, or on the floor.  I dry my hair, make a protein shake, get lunch ready for work, take my vitamins, flat-iron my hair, and watch the weather.

I go upstairs (let Easton play), throw on clothes, get up Ava help her get dressed, and wake up Elle.

We then go downstairs, change Elle, find Ava's shoes, put the twins in their carseats, and make three loads to the car.

I then coax the dogs outside with turkey, cheese, or chicken... sometimes peanut butter.

I drink my protein shake on the way to dropping the kids off... turn up the rap on my XM radio so I can feel cool while I drive a minivan.

Then I drop the kids off at Grammy's house.  She meets me outside to grab one of the twins.  I spend 20 minutes with them in the morning, holding a baby, getting Elle's breakfast prepared, playing, arguing with Ava, etc.

I then drive to work and continuing listening to "cool" music and put on my lipstick.  I think random thoughts... which are no surprise to most of you... I feel fairly certain about this.  In any case, my thoughts vary but generally are something like this: Did I finish the protein shake? Dang, I forgot my running tights! Why is that person driving so slow? I wish I had worn the red sweater today. I wonder if anyone else watches Faceoff? Oh, did I bill at work yesterday? Etc.

I work...

On my lunch break I run or go eat with my friend Lucy.

At five I start on my way home, sometimes stopping to pick up odds and ends for the twins that my mother-in-law has requested for the next day.

We load up into the car and head home.

I get attacked by Momo and Yoshi. 

I take the twins in.  Hopefully it is not bath night, but often it is.  We cook dinner and eat. Elle eats her baby food with us (organic purees, I created during a moment of free time.) Easton eats sometimes, but he doesn't display too much interest in food. He knows Mommy will feed him indefinitely.

By this point it is 7:00 p.m.  Easton is screaming.  We "swaddle and bottle" him. He passes out and goes to his room to sleep. 

Ava goes down at 7:30.  We probably watched "My Little Pony," while "bottling" Easton.  Elle is playing. 

Elle, Terrence, and I wind down. I might run, if I didn't get a chance, but I often mess around on the laptop, read, or watch TV.

Then it is bedtime. Did I mention Elle still doesn't sleep well? Maybe she will sleep well tonight, I think. We go to sleep and I take care of Elle when she wakes up.


To be honest, life isn't too hard anymore it is just "normal," and I am always excited about what tomorrow holds and all of the possibilities.
  

Pulling it Together

My little guy is pulling it all together...

He wanted to gestate forever.

He didn't seem to recover from the first days in the hospital and all of their prodding.

He had jaundice.

He had a hard time learning to latch.

He barely gained his initial weight loss (after birth) back by his 1 month visit.

He didn't look at me.

He seemed to be in pain.

I quit eating dairy, egg, citrus, tomato, and eventually gluten.

He seemed to be terrified.

He startled to some sound, but wouldn't turn to other sounds. 

He seemed to have low muscle tone.

I questioned his hearing.

I questioned his vision.

I questioned his overall development.

We went to the experts - my colleagues.

He was diagnosed with low muscle tone and sensory differences.

I checked his hearing, he passed.

We made a plan.

I continued to question his vision.

I researched.

I spent hours talking to experts.

He started to gain weight. ( I weighed him 2x weekly at work)

He started sleeping through the night.

He took a bath without screaming.

I took him to the ophthalmologist.

He was farsighted.

He had a functional vision assessment by a teacher from the Governor Morehead Preschool Program.

He went to occupational therapy.

He started to get stronger.

He held his head up in prone.

I religiously started infant massage.

He started looking at me.

His eye contact became amazing.

He smiled.

He laughed.

He cooed.

He vocalized in response to my vocalizations.

He seemed happy.

I took him to the ophthalmologist.

He could see. 

His vision has matured.

The sensory differences are disappearing.

Tone is still low, but we have a plan.

He is pulling it all together and teaching his mother more than any amount of school ever could!

A little guy who wants to take his time and teach me how to enjoy the ride. Not to stress... because good things come to those who wait. 

I absolutely love Easton... he is doing amazing things. He will continue to do amazing things! There is no doubt in my mind!

Supper Time

I make fun of some old fashioned things... but I am a believer in others.

For instance, I like people who "court."
I think canning, quilting, and crocheting are cool.
I think the idea of coca-cola and television being a treat sounds magical. 
I like to see families spend time together.






















I think supper time should be at the kitchen table...

So, the Bumgarners are officially back in the swing of things. We are eating dinner together as a unit. For a while it was chaos. We couldn't all eat at the same time. But I think we can now. I am finding this tradition to be old fashioned. Families I go visit at work never eat together, many of them do not even have a dining room table... much less a nutritious meal.

But my life is destined to be different. In fact, I want it different. My grandmother made her family sit at the table...she served nutritious and delicious meals... she even made a quick bread each night to go with the meal. I think sitting at the table is a beautiful thing... a communion. It is also what I want for my family.  What I think makes my family strong, will make my family better, and what will make my family survive. I want to advocate to keep family dinner alive, in all households! ;)

Panoramic?

I've known Nicole since middle school... but we became best friends by first, getting into trouble. 1995 was a good year... that is all I will divulge.

Years passed... We spent the night at each others' houses, shared clothes, called boys, and dreamed about our futures. I didn't go anywhere without Nicole at my side. When I moved back from Germany in 2000, I spent my first night back at her house, and got snowed in! It was awesome! We rented Clueless and ate Subway, I think.

Nicole is my BFF.

I cried when her dog Schwartz died. I threatened the boys who broke her heart. I listened to her Mom, because she is my second mother. I made her threaten the boys who broke my heart. I got a Belk Card and a Credit Card because she had one. When her hair was long, so was mine. She taught me how to take photos of myself by turning the camera around - haha. Nicole was the first person to ride in my car, when I got my license. We enrolled in college classes at the same time and she was with me when I bought wine coolers when I turned 21. We lived together in college, I was her maid-of-honor, and she was the only friend at my wedding. We both lived in Marion for a while and we frequently met to run. Our jobs even crossed paths... because we both work with children.

Then she had Macy, and I was there... waiting and pacing with her Mom! 
I had Ava, and she came to visit, and cuddled Ava.
I held Brody when he was days old.
She held both of the twins, on their first day of life.
I saw Koby when he was less than 24 hours old, and touched his beautiful face. 

Our kids invite each other to their birthday parties. I enjoy these times more than anything I have ever done. Seriously.

Macy turned 5 this week... Standing outside of Nicole's house on Saturday, as we celebrated the big day, I heard Macy yell "Ava! Come here!" It made me reminisce of all the BRTs (be right there), Pepsi freezes, late night phone calls, hurricane stay at home days, watermelon striped shirt guys, blizzards in Boone, Big City Jazzes, drive-bys, pink and yellow decorations, pool days, taco making in bikinis, phi-snakes, El Chapala nights, ROXANNES, Britney-fests, NCAF club meetings, and undoubtedly the list goes on.

I was reminded that we are family... and I wasn't leaving without a picture of our crew. A picture we joked about for her entire pregnancy with Koby, child number 3. We were sure we would need a panoramic camera to capture the moment!

Panoramic? Maybe not... but Nicole and Carly loving six kids, absolutely! 

Infant Massage

We have only just begun infant massage but I have personally decided it should be a mandatory course taught before you leave the hospital with your baby.

It provides bonding time with your child; gives them security; is calming to Mommy; is a great time for language enrichment; is fun and easy... the list goes on. Here is Bumgarner Massage Class Day #2!

You start by greeting the baby with your hands!

Your hands should never leave their body... enjoy eye contact with the baby! 


 (As you can see, I have a customer waiting in my waiting area...)

The satisfied customer!

Another satisfied customer!

I am so lucky to get to share such awesome experiences with my children!

Kitty Winks

Have you ever gotten winked at by a cat? They look directly at you and then blink both eyes. My Dad told me those were kitty winks, and it meant "I love you" in kitty.  Being a speech pathologist, I know all about nonverbal communication; it supposedly comprises 80% of the communication people utilize in interactions while verbal communication is utilized only 20% of the time. You are probably thinking, "Where is she going with this?" Well, I'm tangentially getting there!
        
Terrence and I work all the time. Daily we get up before 6:00 a.m., he goes to work, works 10 hours, then returns home to cook, mow the lawn, and take care of three small children.
I get up, get three kids and myself ready, drop 3 kids off, work 8 hours, pick up three kids, come home, and take care of the three kids and two dogs. I often run a few miles in all this commotion (at least 4x a week).

By 8:30 or 9:00 p.m. we have the kids down. Although Elle is a straggler anymore - she loves Mommy, Daddy, and Elle hour. The dogs are usually passed out and we are ready for a glass of wine and television.

Given this schedule we have little time for each other.  We chat very little... But just a minute ago, I looked over at Terrence and he "kitty winked" at me.  It's the little things in life that make us happy...  and the little things that I am grateful for!


2002, 2007, 2009, 2012 - Great Years for us! (Plus all the time in between)

Our Ophthalmology Visit

Easton has been doing some things that were suggestive of potential farsightedness.  A colleague, my friend, who also happens to be a pediatrician suggested we consider going to a Pediatric Ophthalmologist. Of course, crazy me goes and calls one up in Asheville immediately after our discussion only to be told Easton couldn't be seen until December. I was heart broken! But, I told the receptionist over the phone to put me on a waiting list, in case of a cancellation, and I would be there for sure.  Well they called me yesterday.  I dropped everything and told them "Yes I will be there!"

Easton and I dropped off the girls and headed towards Asheville at 9:00 this morning.  We had an appointment time of 10:15.  From my house it takes 45 minutes to an hour to get to Asheville, 45 minutes if you drive like me 10 years ago and more like an hour if you drive like me these days. We had no trouble finding the office, but I did miss one turn and ended up in a rough section of town. It wasn't too bad, Easton and I are tough.  When we got to the office, I was amazed at how big the place was. Remember I am from the foothills of NC, we don't go all out down here! Of course, the receptionists were greeting you immediately at the front, and seriously couldn't be nicer, more helpful, or cheerful.  We paid our copay and headed to the waiting area. I barely sat down when a chipper and cute blonde said "Easton Bumgarner." She took Easton back to dilate his eyes. He laughed and cooed as she shined lights into his eyes.  She instructed us that it would take 30 minutes for his eyes to dilate and took us back to the waiting room. There I met so many interesting families and children.  One was a man and his daughter who was born prematurely (he never said how many weeks gestation) weighing 1 pound and 9 ounces.  She is a miracle child, now 5, and beautiful. I met a little boy who was turning two and appeared to have motor dyscoordination and severe speech delays. I met an elderly couple who had lived all over the world and celebrated tons of successes. I met a little boy who had the same wolf that Easton has. It was an interesting waiting room, and made me feel oddly secure.

Unfortunately, Easton decided to pee all over me after drinking the only bottle I had brought, and there was no nursing area. I did change him, but my dress had to dry... I only had one evaluation at work today, I don't think the family noticed my pee-pee dress! :) He seemed hungry after the hour we waited so I stood up and swayed with him. About thirty minutes later we were called back to see the Dr.  He diagnosed Easton with moderate hyperopia (+4.5), farsightedness, which was not typical for a child his age.  Some degree of farsightedness is, however.  He made a recommendation for follow up in 8-9 months.  The concern is inward turning of the eyes. We are to watch for that.  Vision could resolve on its own, he could require glasses, or I guess even a patch may be needed. We will take it though! Farsightedness is something I can live with, and I am pretty sure Easton can too. Whew! This has been a tough couple of weeks and this visit made my day!

Boo-hoo, She's a Working Mom

Time is officially up as I go back to work in the morning. I love my job and work with people who have, over the past two years, become my family.  I am also thankful I have a job that can provide income to my family as well as a job that helps so many families, puts a smile on my face, and teaches me more than I could ever learn in another position. However, I am sad.
One of my passions is speech pathology.  I went to school to be a speech pathologist and I really should be jumping up and down in my chair to get back into the swing of things: i.e., determining eligibility for the Infant-Toddler Program in addition to diagnosing speech and language disorders.  But, my other passion - no not running- is being a mom.  I feel rather torn. I am going to miss MY kids so much. Even though Easton whined from 3 a.m. until just an hour ago, Ava drove me crazy talking about ponies for 6 straight hours, and Elle stayed attached to my breast all day, I still want to spend every minute with them. Am I going to miss something? What is tomorrow going to be like? Will I be okay? Most definitely, but I know I will be sad. I am also scared.
I keep telling myself, you did this 3 years ago, without upset. Three years ago, my intern (Rebecca) started on the same day I came back, I had to start scheduling therapy sessions immediately (as I worked for the Public Schools at that time), and I had one itty bitty baby. It was fairly easy getting back into the swing of things. But now I have two itty bitty babies, an accommodating/family friendly/flexible job, and a 3 year old. I think it makes life even harder. I would still be out if I had more time accrued but being that I have had two pregnancies since 2008, I have accrued and maintained very little time with the state. And so is life. 
So I am going back in the morning, taking my breast pump, bringing pictures of the babies, and trying to remain strong. I think I will wear a dress and my big girl lipstick. The red one that Gisella and Lela love. We have a meeting first thing at 8:15, after coffee with the boss man and Lucy at 7:45. Then I will probably cry on Leigh's shoulder as well as complain and joke around she is my office mate and twin mommy/speech pathologist/most understanding friend ever in the world/bam, period, no question, the end. Then I will eventually cry to Cindy, Gisella and Cheryl, stalk Lucy, update Karen on the babies, talk to Kathy for a short bit, ask Natasha seven dozen questions, compliment Lela, and go to the fake beach with Donna. At some point it will be lunch. I will evaluate a child after lunch, smile, write up report findings while talking to Leigh, joke around with Laura, go see Teresa, talk to Doris, hope Joseph pops in, continue to stalk Lucy, and eventually pack my things up to go home. It is going to be okay. It will probably even be awesome. I can do this. I mean my gosh my current motto is, and I am proud to say this over and over again: I am a mother of 3 I can do anything!

3 kids and Mom on a Mission...

I never thought I would be so proud of myself for something so stupid... but alas, I am! Friday morning the kids, all three of them, were up and playing by 6:00 a.m. I was strangely awake, on my second cup of coffee, and itching to get out of the house. I consider myself a morning person, usually, but mornings since the birth of the twins have become rather difficult. In any case,  I knew we were out of diapers, close to out of wipes, wanting new toys, and I needed some chocolate like something fierce. What was the stupid decision I made? Well, I decided to go to Super-Walmart, in LENOIR! That is  25 minute drive, what?
I dressed all three kids, dressed myself, loaded them into the car, and headed out on our trip. Ava wanted food so we stopped at Bojangles on the way. Not my finest breakfast moment, but who doesn't like MSG-ridden-salty-as-heck fries now and again, plus I wanted a chicken biscuit. Shh don't tell anyone, I eat crap from time-to-time. After our stop, we got gas, and turned onto HWY 18. What a nice trip. Ava and I discussed My Little Pony, ate breakfast, and sang a couple of tunes that came on XM. We got to Lenoir during school hours, so traffic was busy. I was enthralled, it felt like real life again. We made it to the Walmart. I parked next to a cart return, and I grabbed a buggy. (Mothers of more than one kid, know the secret of parking next to cart returns). I put Easton in, then Elle, and crammed Ava into left over space. I told her she could put her feet on Elle if need be. We walked around Walmart for at least an hour, talking to all of the elderly women who were interested in twins, and picking up the necessities. I paid for our items, loaded the kids in the car, and navigated us out of the parking lot. We made it, without incident! Way to go Mommy and Bumgarner kids! We traveled home and Ava and I shared some M&Ms.  The twins got fussy about five miles from home, but we made it. I am so proud to get all 3 kids out and about - on my own! My mother said I was crazy for trying... and so many other people can't believe I can manage to get out of the bed much less care for three children... in WALMART no less.  But, honestly, I have to take the 3 kids places, alone, in the future. So why not start on 8/17/12, when the twins were 12 weeks and Ava was 3 years old. Makes the most sense to get as much practice as possible, right? Plus it was fun. Loads of fun! My kids are the best!

                                                              (Us at 6:00 a.m)

Our Life

People ask me all the time "how do you do it?" or "what's it like?"
Well being a mother of three is tough work. Simple things, like getting in  a car is taken for granted, until you have three kids. First I have to load two kids into infant carriers and carry them out to the car and then make Ava walk to the car (if she has found her shoes). I then open my door along with the back right and back left doors. Ava can get in the car and often can buckle herself into her carseat. Usually she is busy picking flowers at this time, and I have to raise my voice seven times to get her attention, "but Mommy, I was making you a bouquet," she says, to which I feel terrible. At this point I just take the flowers and put them in my cup holder for a number of days before they crumble into 3,000 little pieces that I notice swimming in liquid after the dog spills my coffee, by jumping into the car, a week later. In any case, back to the car situation. So Ava is in place, but what about the twins? Well, I have to climb into the back of the van with infant carrier 1 and lock the kid into place, get back out of the van and pick up infant carrier 2 to lock it into place - I can do this from outside the van. Finally I can get in my seat, unless I have to get Ava's bear, pry the dog out of the passenger seat, or check on a baby.  So this is one of my many scenarios, this takes five minutes of a 24 hour day. Get the picture? Life is complicated.
Our most recent schedule goes like this (and this is the perfect day):
5 a.m. -  Easton and Elle wake up to eat
6 a.m. - 9 a.m.  Both babies back to sleep
9 a.m. - 10 a.m.  Babies eat, Ava gets up, Ava eats, I might eat/drink a plant protein shake
10 a.m. - 12:30 p.m. - We all play, watch TV, travel out and about, etc.
12:30 p.m. - Lunchtime for all
1:00 p.m. - 3:00 p.m. - Babies fight sleep and eat, Ava goes off with Grammy, I watch 2 hours of recorded 48 Hours Mystery/Investigators/Dominic Dunne - kinds of shows
3:00 p.m. - 5:00 p.m. - Babies sleep, eat, or play, we wait for Terrence
5:00 p.m. - 7:00 p.m. - We try to get supper together, take turns with the kids, watch the news
7:00 p.m. - 8:00 p.m. - I RUN, Ava goes to bed, the Twins fight sleep/nap
8:00 - 10:00 p.m. - The twins eat, Mommy and Daddy enjoy wine
10:00 p.m. - ? - Everyone sleeps, hopefully all night... sometimes Elle wakes up at 3:00 a.m. for 15 minutes to eat and pass back out... Easton sleeps all night, unless he has a belly ache.

So we are operating on a fairly decent schedule that plays well with me going back to work - as early as next week, eek! I am praying to not go back until after Labor Day, just because I love the little ones so. But we will see.



So here is another fairly complicated thing, that you might take for granted. Eating a meal. Until last night it had been nearly 12 weeks since Terrence and I had eaten out. We have had one date about 6 weeks ago, prior to taking Ava to dinner last night. So it is hard to go anywhere, but eating normal meals is hard work too. I usually drink breakfast (Life's Basics has an expensive but tasty plant protein that fairs well with almond milk and a banana), I gulp down a quick lunch or not, grab a spoon of peanut butter here and there, and eat supper with 1 baby, two babies, not at all, or with Ava. Terrence and I don't eat together. Some days all I have to eat is a protein shake, two tablespoons of peanut butter, several cups of coffee (yes coffee is a food group), and two glasses of red wine (wine is also a food group). I can wear clothes from high school, to which I think, I might publish this diet, it is called the "have twins diet": in this diet you don't eat, drink lots of caffeine, drink alcohol, exercise when you can, and still lose weight. Amazing! But seriously, life is complicated at this point.
The Bumgarners are content and fairly happy now. We are working on establishing a schedule that we can all live and sustain for a number of years. At some point I hope to eat more, exercise more, spend more time with my dogs, and play with all three kids at the same time. I hope Terrence can get to a point where he doesn't sleep in the recliner during our adult time which is 8:00 p.m. - 10:00 p.m. I think Terrence and I have done an amazing job with these kids. We have the perfect life. It is just a bit complicated, a tad crazy, and totally worth it!

Momo

They say the relationship between a boy and his dog is a strong one... Here's hoping Momo and Easton will be best friends for years to come.  

Let me tell the quick story of how Momo became a Bumgarner. I met Terrence in February of 2002. We married in February of 2007. By summer of 2007 I felt like something was missing. I had a lot of time to dwell on my loneliness as I worked for the schools then and didn't do private therapy at the time. Needless to say, I had tons of time during the day to myself. I started asking for a dog. Terrence got me a game for my gameboy "Nintendogs," to play with during the day. He told me if I did good with my Nintendog, he'd consider getting me a real one! Haha! 

The fall came, I went back to work and continued to dream about a puppy. At Christmas, we were told about a Miniature Schnauzer named Tinsel who was in need of a home. We discussed it and became super excited about bringing Tinsel Bumgarner home. For some reason I had to work late and Terrence had gone to pick up Tinsel when plans fell through. I had no idea that he wouldn't be bringing Tinsel home. He was devastated and made a quick decision. I got home from work around 7:30 and saw the cutest little dog sitting on Terrence's lap. I said "That's not a schnauzer, that's a yorkie! Like the one in my game!" Momo was tiny, he shivered and needed a coat, he loved to run, he liked car rides, he peed on everything, and he ate food piece by piece - he was everything I ever imagined! He weaseled his way into our bed that night. I didn't sleep. Over the years, Momo has become one of my best friends. As weird as that sounds, he enjoys things I enjoy and makes me tremendously happy. Our family has changed a lot since 2007, but one thing hasn't... that darn dog still sleeps in our bed!

The Chair

I have been asked "How do you do it?" a number of times since the twins were born.  Well the simple answer is "I have to." I wake up to feed the twins, I let the dogs out, I fix coffee, I get up Ava, I fix myself a protein shake, I make Ava breakfast, I help her change, we go to swim lessons, we come home, feed the babies, make lunch, feed the dogs, rest a bit, play a bit, feed the babies some more,welcome Terrence home, get supper ready, feed babies, get Ava ready for bed, watch television, feed the babies, and then go to bed.  A feeding may happen again, but otherwise this is our daily schedule. A good deal of the day, I sit in "the chair." It has become my Facebook profile photo which prompted many questions, comments, and likes. I posted the picture because I wanted to share what it really looks like at my house day-to-day. The chair has been my friend for a number of years. When I was pregnant with Ava, it offered back support and eased my pain. I learned to nurse Ava in this chair. I have slept in the chair with my dogs when I was sick and cuddled with them when I was really tired or needed doggie love.  I hated the chair when I was pregnant with the twins, but found it to be the best place to tandem nurse once they were born. Now I have "five children." (Ava, the dogs, and the twins). They all have been with their Mommy individually in this chair and still find comfort in sitting in it - even if they have to share a spot with 4 of their siblings!

Education

Being a parent has provided me tons more education than any college course or work experience as a pediatric speech pathologist have ever taught me.

1) I am constantly exposed to new behaviors i.e., watching my three-year-old tantrum over a "My Little Pony Book," in Barnes & Noble which left many of the customers shocked beyond words, because I "ignored" her then carried her out to the van to calm her down - we do not own the book I refused to give in.

2) I have also learned new words e.g., bleb as in "When my right breast began hurting from nursing, I took a close look at the nipple and discovered a milk blister (aka "bleb") forming on it.

3) I have begun implementing different parenting styles and techniques. For example, we tried CIO (cry it out) with Ava at six months, "on demand feeding" to get through growth spurts, and redirection to name a few.

 

4)As a mom I have provided more intervention both medical and therapeutic than I ever thought I would. We have removed splinters, taught s-blends, demonstrated proper pencil grip, promoted tummy time, and helped our  children gain critical weight. 

5) I have also had to make important financial decisions such as do we buy Pampers or Tugaboos this week as well as can we afford a brand new mini van? 

I enjoy being a parent and I enjoy learning, so really the two mesh well.  Now I have to learn the secrets to getting the twins to sleep through the night and potty training Ava so I can add "I have discovered superpowers" to my list of aforementioned things!