Boo-hoo, She's a Working Mom

Time is officially up as I go back to work in the morning. I love my job and work with people who have, over the past two years, become my family.  I am also thankful I have a job that can provide income to my family as well as a job that helps so many families, puts a smile on my face, and teaches me more than I could ever learn in another position. However, I am sad.
One of my passions is speech pathology.  I went to school to be a speech pathologist and I really should be jumping up and down in my chair to get back into the swing of things: i.e., determining eligibility for the Infant-Toddler Program in addition to diagnosing speech and language disorders.  But, my other passion - no not running- is being a mom.  I feel rather torn. I am going to miss MY kids so much. Even though Easton whined from 3 a.m. until just an hour ago, Ava drove me crazy talking about ponies for 6 straight hours, and Elle stayed attached to my breast all day, I still want to spend every minute with them. Am I going to miss something? What is tomorrow going to be like? Will I be okay? Most definitely, but I know I will be sad. I am also scared.
I keep telling myself, you did this 3 years ago, without upset. Three years ago, my intern (Rebecca) started on the same day I came back, I had to start scheduling therapy sessions immediately (as I worked for the Public Schools at that time), and I had one itty bitty baby. It was fairly easy getting back into the swing of things. But now I have two itty bitty babies, an accommodating/family friendly/flexible job, and a 3 year old. I think it makes life even harder. I would still be out if I had more time accrued but being that I have had two pregnancies since 2008, I have accrued and maintained very little time with the state. And so is life. 
So I am going back in the morning, taking my breast pump, bringing pictures of the babies, and trying to remain strong. I think I will wear a dress and my big girl lipstick. The red one that Gisella and Lela love. We have a meeting first thing at 8:15, after coffee with the boss man and Lucy at 7:45. Then I will probably cry on Leigh's shoulder as well as complain and joke around she is my office mate and twin mommy/speech pathologist/most understanding friend ever in the world/bam, period, no question, the end. Then I will eventually cry to Cindy, Gisella and Cheryl, stalk Lucy, update Karen on the babies, talk to Kathy for a short bit, ask Natasha seven dozen questions, compliment Lela, and go to the fake beach with Donna. At some point it will be lunch. I will evaluate a child after lunch, smile, write up report findings while talking to Leigh, joke around with Laura, go see Teresa, talk to Doris, hope Joseph pops in, continue to stalk Lucy, and eventually pack my things up to go home. It is going to be okay. It will probably even be awesome. I can do this. I mean my gosh my current motto is, and I am proud to say this over and over again: I am a mother of 3 I can do anything!